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Dating a married man is an emotional roller coaster. It is emotionally exhausting and also draining.In this article am gonna be give u advice on how to stop dating a married man.
On the other hand, the dilemma is that a married man possesses the charm and maturity most single men don’t, which is alluring for any woman. Whether you believe it or not, dating a married man can have terrible consequences for you, you, and him.
When you’ve fallen in love with a married man, it is easy to get used to the unpredictable, unstable, and sometimes thrilling relationship. You might have even convinced yourself that he’s the one for you, which can make it next to impossible for you to walk away.
The fact that you are willing to embark on this journey to stop dating a married man is brave. I must applaud being courageous.
The good news is that regardless of how far gone you are into the affair, you can turn a new leaf when you decide to.
Finding the courage to end the affair is extremely tough and isn’t instantaneous, but worry not. I have a step by step guide to taking you through the process of stopping to date a married man, from start to finish.
Step by step, guide on how to stop dating a married man.
Step 1. Deal with your image of love.
Most often than not, when we accept less than we deserve, it’s because we believe that we deserve less. Redefining how you view love will enable you to deal with any negative thoughts and beliefs you might have towards love. Once this is done, you will clearly see why your affair with a married man is not healthy for you.
Step 2. Figure out why you are dating him in the first place.
Recognizing why you are involved with the married man is the first step towards freedom from the affair.
The reasons why you were willing to sell your aorta for a quarter will enable you to see where things went wrong. If it’s unresolved issues towards men or any pain, or whatever else it is so you can deal with it.
Step 3. Forgive yourself.
After you deal with the factors that made you susceptible to being the mistress, forgive yourself. Guilt is a troublesome burden to carry around. Besides, you’re not the only one to blame for the mess. Take all the time you need. However, in the end, please, forgive yourself.
Step 4. End it.
By this step, you will probably have gathered the courage to break up with him. Don’t think it through.
Just get up one morning, meet up with him, and break up. Don’t drag it out; it will only get harder the longer you wait. So end it now while you still can.
Step 5. Find a support system.
During the affair, you had to lie to everyone else you cared about. Chances are that none of your friends and family knew about your married boyfriend.
This is the time for you to open up to them because you need the support of loved ones now more than ever.
Step 6. Move on.
Re-establish your life, get new hobbies, travel, and just get back to doing the healthy things that you loved doing before. Get out there, and when you find him,
I mean your real soulmate (he won’t be married btw) eventually, you will love him hard.
Good things don’t come easy; they take time. So will your healing process. Be patient with yourself, one step after the other, and one day even this will be behind you.
How to let go of a married man.
Many people argue that you should stop the affair for the moral reason of avoiding to hurt the wife and the children if he has any.
However, did you know that the affair affects you even more than the wife or the children? You owe it yourself to end the fair, if not for anything, for your own happiness.
Affairs begin solely based on lust; you only fall in love later on during the relationship. Sometimes you don’t even realize that you have fallen in love with the man. Sadly, falling in love with the adulterer is as good as pulling the trigger on yourself.
Love grows in the most unexpected places; most times, we can’t control who we love. So, when you have fallen in love with a married man, it becomes harder to let go of him. Here are some tips that will make your process of letting go easier.You can find signs if a married man is falling in love with you in my 14 Secret Signs a married man is falling in love with you
1. Expect the breakup to hurt.
Pain is meant to be felt. If you try to avoid it, it just keeps resurfacing in subtle forms. Anticipating the hurt will make it easier for you to bear.
The truth is letting go of someone that you dislike can hurt a little bit, how much more someone you love.
2. Realize that you are not alone.
You have a support system of friends and family who cherish you. Do not ever feel like you are all alone. I know it’s your cross to bear.
However, even then, you don’t have to carry it alone. Talk to your family and friends, cry, laugh, and do whatever it takes to make you feel better.
3. Please stop lying to yourself.
No, he is never going to leave his wife. No, he isn’t the one for you and sure as hell. All the lies you have made yourself throughout the affair need to stop.
You have to stop lying to yourself and the people you love. Remember, the truth liberates so darling, face the truth and stop dating the married man, however hard it may be.
4. Remember that you are not in love with the real man.
During the affair, what you see is what the man lets you see. You don’t even know the real him.
You are not in love with him but rather in love with the idea of him. The man you are in love with doesn’t exist.
5. Like all things, this too will pass.
Be encouraged, nothing lasts forever, even love. It’s only a matter of time, and the married man will have no effect on you.
Take it from someone who has been through it. Time really does heal all wounds.
6. Cut off all contact, especially social media.
Delete his number and all social media accounts. If you can still see his updates, you’ll be tempted to communicate; you are back to square one once you speak with him.
Cut all contact until you’re in a better state of mind regarding him.
7. Allow yourself time to heal.
Don’t rush into another relationship right away. Allow yourself time to process and heal from the emotional damages caused by the affair. All good and perfect things take time. Don’t rush the process.
8. Get help.
Consider getting counseling. Dating a married man is traumatic enough, adding to that the pain to let go of a love you have grown accustomed to receiving could make anyone crazy.
A counselor will help you work through it all.
9. Start afresh
If you need to shift, travel, or find new love, whatever it takes, turn a new leaf. Start living again. You deserve it.
I know it isn’t easy giving up your love, even if it is your poison and slowly killing you, the heart wants it.
Slowly but surely, one day at a time, I am optimistic that you will walk through this step by step. You are a lot stronger than you realize.
How do I make a married man leave me alone?
Men can be persistent most, especially when you have caught their attention. This persistence is irritating when you are not interested in pursuing a relationship with him.
You don’t have to bear the irritation anymore, here are tried and tips to make a married man leave you alone.
1. Give your married BF a pregnancy scare.
This might sound funny, but it works. No one runs away as quickly as a man who doesn’t want to take responsibility for his actions.
Many married men may be honorable, but the idea of having children outside his marriage is unbearable for most of them.
Obviously, this only works when you have had sex together.
2. Threaten to tell the wife.
I know you’d never do that, which is why I said to threaten. It helps when you have stored proof like emails or texts. If the pregnancy didn’t scare the man, this should.
We all know that married men would never leave their wives, so you might have opened an exit door for him if you use this against him.
3. Get a restraining order.
When he still won’t bark out, it might be more severe than you imagine. He could be obsessed with you, and that dangerous. You might need to get a restraining order against him.
It is the most frustrating thing under the sun when a man you are not interested in just won’t leave you alone. With the tips above, I hope you will be able to handle any unwanted attention from a married man who stubbornly won’t leave you.
How to get rid of a married man who is hitting on you.
Men like to flirt, don’t they? They flirt a lot, do not necessarily take the rejection to heart.
Unwelcome attention from a married man every now and then occurs, that doesn’t mean you are obliged to smile and bear it.
Remember when a married man is hitting on you, and you reciprocate, you are daring the devil himself.
A married man can flirt for several reasons. It could be innocent and fun, or he might be pursuing you for a relationship.
When a married man is hitting on you and gives you all the signals which you reject, he may still pursue you.
He may even try and manipulate you by professing his love for you. Handling a married man who is hitting on, you can be awkward. If you are looking for tips on how to get rid of a married man hitting on you, read on.
1. Assert and distance yourself
If you really need to stop dating the married man you need to be firm with your responses so that he doesn’t get it twisted. You do not appreciate his advances, so you have to let him know.
2. Distance yourself.
Putting space between you and him will help reduce whatever attraction he has. In any case, out of sight is out of mind, you need to be as unavailable as you can for this man.
3. Resist the urge to respond; don’t flirt back.
Attention feels good to your ego; you might have the urge to flirt back because you like the feeling. Unfortunately, flirting around with a married man will encourage him and his advances. That is far from what we want, isn’t it?
4. Make your boundaries clear.
Let him know what is acceptable to him. How far is too far? This will clarify what sorts of behavior you will not take from him and how you expect him to treat you.
Men respect boundaries. If you spell it out how to don’t appreciate his advances, he will most likely stop bothering you.
5. Block the guy.
Block his phone calls, his Facebook, his Instagram, or whatever account he communicates to you. He can’t talk to you if he is blocked.
For your sake and sanity, you have to stop him everywhere.
6. Talk about your boyfriend.
Even if you are single, talk about other men in his presence. A man and his ego can’t take it when the girl he likes keeps mentioning another man. He will get irritated and lose interest, and will most likely leave you alone.
Men will all always be men; they will hit on whoever they like. In fact, many of them flirt to gauge your interest level. Just stand your ground when you are not interested.
Mama Nkima is a marriage counselor and relationship expert who has dedicated her life to helping couples build strong, healthy relationships. She has academic degrees in Education and Psychology. She has over 40 years of experience helping couples and individuals work through their relationship issues.
She draws on her own experiences as a spiritual guide but also from years of research to offer readers practical, actionable advice.